Analysis and Remarks: Feature Story –Peranakan Culture Influence on Batik and Fashion

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Source: Peranakan culture: Major influence on batik, fashion

To begin the analysis, let’s see the headline:

Peranakan culture: Major influence on batik, fashion

Here is an alternate headline: Peranakan culture’s major influence on batik fashion.

Now, see the difference? Not only is the original headline more compact, it also is more attractive. It avoids the use of apostrophe, and instead it uses the colon. Somehow it fits perfectly with the capitalized M, since you have to capitalize the letter after a colon. It adds a stressing effect on the word Major. There is nothing major in lowercase-m ‘major’, if you catch my drift.

The headline actually tries to convey a message that Peranakan culture or the culture of Chinese descends influences batik and fashion.

But, one thing that is making the article less appealing to the common readers is the paragraphs. They are to long. One or two sentences per paragraph and free more spaces between them would be enjoyable to read. Common people who are not expert in batik and fashion would have a hard time reading it and eventually get bored.


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